23.
Lastly, “I remember feeling confused, and I somewhat found myself in a dream-like state, although I was pretty lucid in it as well. There were quite a few psychedelic-like experiences, and it felt like such a long dream. It just kept on going and going. I didn’t have a body anymore, and I actually asked myself, Am I dead? Since this couldn’t be a dream, I usually wake up when I become aware of a dream, and I wasn’t waking up. It felt like it went on forever.”
“What was going on, this part I had no recollection of, I guess somewhere or sometime in my sleep, I had stopped breathing. I was pretty lucky because my family had stopped by the house to check on me. They noticed my car was still in the driveway, which meant I wasn’t at work, and I wasn’t getting the door. Looking through the window, they could see me lying there in bed, not moving. I wasn’t responding either, so they went through a window, and I was unresponsive, so 911 was called.
I believe it took them a couple of hours trying to get me back and keep me stable, but my lungs weren’t working, so they had to intubate, and I was in a coma with life support, all that fun stuff, for about two days. I was still pretty much in the other place for a long time. It felt like I was traveling through space or something. I saw and experienced a lot of amazing things I can’t explain or remember well anymore.
I wasn’t scared. It felt like a really long journey. I didn’t necessarily see anyone for a while, but I didn’t feel alone. I felt the presence of others. There was this black infinite darkness, and it was the most wonderful thing. It was like I could create an experience with my imagination; there was no sadness, only bliss without worry. And it was very hypnotizing. I really considered letting myself go into it. Just letting go.
I didn’t want to let go, though. I have a daughter who is my world. She was just about a year old at the time, and I kept thinking of her and her mother; it kept me from just letting go into that peaceful bliss. I couldn’t leave them.”